Tricky Love, or Real Love?
I was 15 years old and just starting high school, the times when all we care about is what people think about us and how we look. When we are generally going through "changes" and life makes it a point to get a significant other and be cool. I was enjoying the new life as a high schooler feeling mature and grown up, I thought I was on top of the world and it was the coolest to rebel.
So there I was, sitting in the lunch room with my friends, it was fun because on half of the table was guys I knew and the other half was girls, I didn't know. We would make jokes and "try" to hit on the girls but most of the time they were not having it and we got shot down. I liked one of the girls at the table, but I really didn't know her. This went on for a while but then it was time to get serious, it was The Homecoming Dance soon and I needed a date!! So think of who I liked more then a friend, I ran through the list of girls I knew. Thinking of all of them as friends, the dance is only a month away at this point.
Then unexpectedly one day at lunch, all the guys at my table decided to go to the bathroom, I thought well that was weird, they all needed to go at the same time... so I sat there eating my chicken sandwich and french fries from the oh-so healthy lunch room food choices. Surprisingly one of the girls from the other side of the table got up and walked to my side, sat right across from me and asked how I was.. I answered swallowing a bite of my chicken sandwich, "not to bad, how are you?". She replied, "I am doing good". We sat for a second which seemed at the time a few minutes just looking into each others eyes. I was fine with this because it just so happened to be the girl I liked, I thought to myself, why haven't I thought of asking her before when I was thinking of girls to ask??!!! Then, she asked the question.. "Are you planning on going to the dance?". At the time I was contemplating whether or not to go because I didn't have a date. "I'm not sure, what about you?" I said. She said, "I was hoping someone would ask me but they haven't yet". I hoped she was talking about me! "who were you hoping asked you?" I said. She replied, "I really want this cute guy to ask me", then she described what he looked like, and turned out to be what I looked like and what I was wearing that day. Realizing it was me, I quickly asked if she would go to the dance with me. She replied as I was half way done with the question, "YES!!! Took you long enough", as we both giggled, as if no one else was around. From that moment on I knew it was love. Or so I thought it was LOVE.
We started dating each other, the days we spent together were great! The dance came, had a blast and started hanging out more with each other. We really liked/loved each other! Started doing everything together, her friends became mine, mine became hers things were great. Then about a week before school got out for summer, about 7 months later, she hit me with the biggest question of my short high school life, "I am moving to a different state, do you want to still be together or make it work in a long term relationship? let me know" I sat there frozen, so many thoughts going through my head, but i'm not ready or capable of a long term relationship, I mean i'm only 15 and at the same time my heart was beating with a sharp pain, my heart was hurting. For the first time I knew what it was like to be heart broken, or so I thought. The next day I gave here an answer, "I don't think we should still be together, i'm not ready for that. I wish I was but i'm not". Waiting to get an ear full from her, mixed with a few tears... but all I got was a mature, "Okay, I hope we can still be friends". My heart expecting to hurt the moment I told her, but it wasn't, questioning myself was I not really in love? what was I feeling then?? I answered, "I hope we can be too". The end of the year ended rather quick, a little upset that I wouldn't have a girlfriend to spend the summer with.
I was going to summer school, so I could be ahead and didn't have to take the class during the year. And there just so happened to be my most resent ex-girlfriend friends in the class, her best friend. We knew each other because we had hung out with each other a few times. We started talking and then eventually started dating.. Is it wrong to date my ex-girlfriends best friend, even though she moved to a different state and we're still friend?? We quickly got to know each other and spent every second we could with each other, I couldn't help my self but "LOVE" this girl, I wasn't planning on getting so close to someone so fast. Then one day, it just came out, "I LOVE YOU" it felt so natural to say it to her. So it must have been "REAL" right? A year and a half later things just started to get routine, and we kind of drifted away, stopped talking every time we could, started to hang out with different friends, got in meaning less arguments for no reason. Things were not going very well, and about a month of this we realized, we fell "OUT" of love? I was still willing work at it, but was she willing doing the same?? I was still going to stick with it, but she had other plans.
Then one day I got a call........ She broke up with me, and the thing was I was going to work that day. I worked for my dad at the time, and being the way I am, I didn't want my parents to know I was having "relationship problems". So I couldn't stay home from work, otherwise I would have went over to her house and tried to make up with her. But I guess we will never know because... it never happened. My heart was crushed for months, I could not stop thinking about her and all the good times we had together, I was still in love with her for months after that. The last time we talked was on the phone that day, and as a hard headed 17 year old guy I was, I am ashamed to say I said some very rude things to her. I regret it and I am sorry to her and all women, but I also had learned to never speak to a woman like that again. And it was a day of growing up... A LOT! I changed, and as the months went on my heart started to hurt less and less.
I started dating again but nothing serious, I was trying to avoid that. Then senior year came, PROM, the biggest dance of The High School Years. I then again, needed a date, a girl in my math class was the girl I wanted to take, we hadn't really talked to each other but knew each other through friends. It was a little more then a month till prom, with so much planning to do, so I had to ask soon! We had both went to a school football game, with different friends but we all knew each other. So I invited a few of the friends over to my place, everyone knew I was going to ask her that night, so everyone was kind of giving hints to me to ask her, The Whole Time! I was a little nervous because I started to like her, we had been talking via computer. As everyone was about to leave I took her aside and asked the question, a little nervous, under the stars, with a full moon brightening up her face, "Will you go to prom with me?" She hesitated a second, and said "i'm not sure, I wasn't planning on going". So I said "well let me know if you want to". she responded, "okay, I had fun tonight, see you tomorrow in class" with smile on her face, looking so beautiful as the moon light struck her. The next week, I asked her to hang out to get to know each other better, and after a couple days of hanging out, she finally gave me a answer, "Yes, I would love to go to prom with you". I was excited to finally get an answer and then we started planning on what we want to do. Prom finally came, it was amazing to say the least!!! I knew I already loved her before the dance, so quick was unexpected, but I wanted to save it for a special moment we would never forget.
At PROM, in the center of the dance floor, slow dancing, lights dime, deep in the moment, gazing into one another's eyes, I spoke softly "I LOVE YOU", and got a soft response back, saying "I LOVE YOU TOO"! Ever since that day I loved that woman, I still do! After all the amazing times we had together, traveling together, both have loving families and nothing can break that, spending every second together, we were "two peas in a pod" I love her to this day. We just had our 3 year anniversary last week!!! And the Love I felt when we first started dating was greater then I had ever felt before, and is still growing stronger every day.
I believe there are two kinds of love, the love that makes you grow as a person and the love you will end up with, THE ONE AND ONLY!!!
So I leave you with this question, is there Tricky Love, or Real Love? or both?
Tell me some of your love stories or comment on mine, I wish you all well and hearts go out.
